Cosmic Joker's Laughing His Ass Off
by Crumpled Paper Hearts
Summary: Eren supposes it's the cosmic joker trying to urge him to make a move, or just an string of unlikely events- happenstances, if you will. But in actuality, it's just Eren having another bad day. Those are the series of thoughts that fly by his mind as his back hits the forest floor, being pinned down by Corporal Rivaille. ERERI FLUFF.


this actually comes with a drawing, PM me if you want a better view.

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Eren supposes it's the cosmic joker trying to urge him to make a move, or just an string of unlikely events- happenstances, if you will. But in actuality, it's just Eren having another bad day.

Those are the series of thoughts that fly by his mind as his back hits the forest floor .

Struggling, the Titan-shifted realizes far too late that if this was an actual assassination attempt, he'd be 6-feet underground by now.

"You're a pitiful excuse for a soldier."

The baritone of his superior is coated in poison and snark as he gives a piece of his (albeit sardonic) mind.

"I'm s-sorry Heichou."

"And that's what you tell the man who murders you, yes?"

Prodding Eren's self-esteem seems to add to the list of the Corporal's hobbies- almost topping making sure everything shines with cleanliness and killing the giant freaks that loom outside Wall Rose.

Eren bites his lip and looks down, ashamed and a little irritated in himself, if he was being honest. He'd been doing fine; tapping into his time with Bertolt when still in training and injecting some of the moves he learned off of Annie.

_**Annie.**_

It's the reason why he's in this position in the first place. After their conundrum inside Wall Sina, Commander Pixis decided that it was in everyone's best interest that they double the martial arts curriculum.

No one sat with him on lunch that day.

But the young Jaeger supposes it's for the best- it would have saved him a great deal of time (and the city's taxes) if he'd been able to topple Annie's superior fighting skill.

Alas, he didn't. But you can't say he's not trying.

"You're pathetic. We're you even trying back in Wall Sina? I've seen children who grapple better than you." Rivaille twists his arm farther, sending an uncomfortable sensation down Eren's forearm as he fidgets.

Lance Corporal Levi Rivaille wasn't suppose to be the one teaching him. It was suppose to be Survey Corps Commander Erwin Smith, but the (perfectly eyebrow'd) gentleman politely refused and Levi was just at the wrong place a the wrong time.

The crop-haired 5"3 wall of solid muscle and fury spent days trying to change his predicament of, as he puts, "teaching the brat how to be the soldier, which I'm sure was what training was FOR".

But just like Sasha Blaus' craving for anything to chuck down her throat; his absolution was not found.

He'd been doing well, of in his superior's tone, "not bad… But not good either"- until the shorter man had too, his hand, swung him back and kicked him off his legs. The 104th scouting graduate reached out and held on his heichou's forearm for purchase, feeling the smooth and pristinely clean leather under the pads of his fingers.

Just when he thought that he might was saved himself from a nasty fall, his sparring partner dropped his (impossibly exponential) weight on him, sending him to drop into the grass and soil beneath them.

No one expected him to beat Levi of all people. But it's just that bit embarrassing to be compromised 40 seconds in.

"Come on. Get up."

The weight on top of him alleviates, and the pressure moves to his arm instead. Before he can determine why- there's something flapping in his face, clouding his vision in a solid white.

Eren stops fidgeting and moves his head sideways- to realize that it's the white scarf strung about the Corporal's neck that's been slapping him in the face. Usually he'd be annoyed, it's running up and down his skin and tickling his lips, but the silk scarf was soft and velvety and smelled like bleach and home.

Eren hummed thoughtfully at the rush of emotions.

Sure, Levi was scary. Sure, it was suppose to be professional. Sure. He could kill him without batting an eye. But there was something- dare he say; intimate- about laying under the guy who saved your life by cutting you out from the nape of your fabricated titan on the forest floor.

And if said guy was coincidentally your idol since you could utter the words "kill" and "revenge", which you've been secretly fawning over in your cabin dorm late at night…

Well, to each his own.

Not that that was what he was thinking about.

Because it's not.

"Oi." Comes a grim bark. "Wipe that dumb look off your fucking face, stupid brat."

He bites back a whimper because he realizes the pressure in his arm is the corporal's hand still intertwined with his own.  
Corporal's. Hand.

"C-Corporal, I…" There's a searing heat that crawls up his face and colors it a faint shade of pink.

His idol rambles on, "Honestly. I don't understand how you passed with so little self-defense training. Those fucking slackers." He clicks his tongue, "C'mon, restore my faith in humanity or something- there will be times that get harder and this is just BASICS, so get up."

Charcoal gray eyes pierce him down and it seems like it's not only the times that are getting harder.

A surge of panic runs up his spine- and in an effort to avenge what little view the man above him holds, he fights back.

He tightened their makeshift handhold, then outstretched his arm. Knowing that was where Levi had carelessly placed his center of balance- he dropped into Eren's chest- where he flipped themselves over- trapping Rivaille in between Eren's thighs.

A fleeting feeling of triumph made him grin widely before it was replaces by fear of topping Heichou- even if it was his instructions. He gulped nervously.

Levi has an impassive look etched on his features- and they held their stare for approximately 14.05 seconds (not that Eren was counting) before Levi 'hmph'd indignantly before unceremoniously picking the boy up and off his body and throwing him aside before flipping to his feet.

"You're filthy." He muttered as he strutted out of the mess of trees near the castle, but not before murmuring a soft "Good job".


End file.
